Over the past year I've discussed my feelings for "QQ." Privately...well as private Blogger could be. I don't even know who actually reads the sappy BS of a guy...but oh well.
I finally told her. Took long enough, eh Freefallin?
ok. well maybe i waited too long to say it...but...you know those QQ-knocks at 10 am made me smile because i knew you were online. 891 was our secret code for goodbye. your two surprise calls on skype and online brightend my day... remember all those things i asked you before about love? they were all related to you...and now it's getting harder to keep this secret…
March 25, 2011, Tommy
and then i said the words...after 2 hours of chatting with my friend about what to do. and then i did it...then after waiting a full 12-hours of not going on facebook or renren, i check her reply.
r u joking? 4.1 is not far away...
March 27, 2011, QQ
have you any idea what 4.1 is? 4.1 earthquake? 4.1-what? for about 10 minutes, i stood against the freezing wind unsure what 4.1 was. the new month? should i have waited until the new month to tell her? had i ruined her month of march? i skipped Chinese New Years...her birthday and last weekend for tonight (3/26) to tell her...
am i joking? 4.1...April 1st...
that's the thing with QQ (the girl, not the chatting program). I tried predicting her response with the most practical reasoning: "Oh, Tommy...I'm sorry but I don't feel the same for you" or "Tommy, I feel the same for you." basically "yes, i also like you" or "no, i don't like you." How could someone consider that she's going to think it's an April Fool's day joke! Anyways...the point I'm trying to make it...there is no point that i can think of. i really don't know how to feel now...neutral? perhaps...i could reply with, "why the hell would you think im joking?" but then again...im not really a jerk...o well...
before i had an idea of where i was going...but now i have no clue...
keep your head up.
ReplyDeleteyour heart is big.
o thanks. you're very kind.
ReplyDelete